The Dried Pen

[Hamza23]

The Dried Pen

I have never seen your letters for long time now
I always thought they will arrive
But they never did
What’s wrong, why haven’t you written to me?
Don’t you trust me anymore?
I see you sad and crying
But you never held the pen
And told me why
I see you thinking, then when I ask
You answer with “Nothing is wrong!”
What’s wrong my dear friend?
What makes you suffer now days?
If only I knew I would had helped
You saw that my pen never dries
I even declared the worst news to you
But you haven’t done that for long time
How am I going to know what’s in your heart
If you had changed the key
And now I can’t read your eyes
Because of the tears filling them
Now I see you trust me no more
I would be the last to know anything
Why are you making me suffer?
Tell me, and I will change your pen
Write to me once more, I am desired to hear your voice again

[Hamza23]

Dried pen refers to not speakin to the other

wrote to me is have a conversation about ur personal things

the poem was dedicated to my friend,, and alhamdu lilah everything worked out like i wanted it to

[بسـ الطفـε(｡◕‿◕｡)зـوله ــمة]

U are so cute walla

the fact that u think about ur friends so much ,
willing to help them and share their moments of pain

A nice poem as usuall Hamooza

Regards

[Hamza23]

اقتباس:
المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة ♥МღА♥ЯღІ♥АღМ♥ [فقط الأعضاء المسجلين والمفعلين يمكنهم رؤية الوصلات . إضغط هنا للتسجيل]
U are so cute walla

the fact that u think about ur friends so much ,
willing to help them and share their moments of pain

A nice poem as usuall Hamooza

Regards




well if i didnt think of them then it wont called friendship

but sometimes i write harsh poems hhh but i dont show them hhhhhh

one day i will try to post the novel "The story of Lina: A turning Point",, and u will c the difference,, btw Lina is not a real girl,, and u will discover about her soon

thanx for passing by

[بسـ الطفـε(｡◕‿◕｡)зـوله ــمة]

hahahaha

Ok Ok , I beleive the second part too , biut u should show them everything

and I am \waiting to read ur story about ( YOUR IMAGINARY FRIEND LINA

u know I am joking ^_*

)

[Hamza23]

اقتباس:
المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة ♥МღА♥ЯღІ♥АღМ♥ [فقط الأعضاء المسجلين والمفعلين يمكنهم رؤية الوصلات . إضغط هنا للتسجيل]
hahahaha

Ok Ok , I beleive the second part too , biut u should show them everything

and I am \waiting to read ur story about ( YOUR IMAGINARY FRIEND LINA

u know I am joking ^_*

)


she isnt an imaginary friend hhhh

Lina is a nick ma sis made for me so its about me

but not really me

so its me in a different behavior and it is a harsh one hhhh

its long so i might type it 2morw when am not busy in skool

[Iron Man]

thanks for sharing this nice poem dear Hammoza

you're so romantic

[Hamza23]

اقتباس:
المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة Iron Man [فقط الأعضاء المسجلين والمفعلين يمكنهم رؤية الوصلات . إضغط هنا للتسجيل]
thanks for sharing this nice poem dear Hammoza

you're so romantic





thanx iron ^^

thanx for passing by

[Little Cat]

Hello,
Nice poem though had few grammatical mistakes, first mistake I've noticed was in the first line, you wrote "I have never seen your letters" then you said "for long time now", the problem is when you use never then it mean never at all, saying for long time means it happened at least for once before so you added never to once and that's impossible, either never or long time..
I noticed another mistake in the third line, "thought they'll never arrive" after thought you had to use would, because thought is in the past so "will" should be "would"..
"If only I knew I would had helped " was the third mistake, you can't use had after would, I think it's supposed to be have instead.

Now I have to say I liked the second part of the poem and haven't noticed any mistakes in it, talking about heart, key, reading eye, and tears filling seemed lovely.

Peace

[Hamza23]

in here loool i want u to re-read the poem

u didnt get the point of it did u??

sometimes u must have some change in the words order to make it flow easier

thank u for passin by